every smith
  • MS: Max Smith's blog
  • History to the Defeated
  • every smith: independent creative consultants
  • Words: Max - a brief bio
  • Sites to see

Not Dark Yet #326: People who need people

25/1/2021

5 Comments

 
Picture
​You’re a headhunter. You are tasked by the Labour Party to recruit a “social listening and media organising manager” who will work in the office of the Leader of the Opposition. Where do you start and finish your search?
 
There are, of course, thousands of young socialists who are remarkably adept at social media. But you don’t want one of those. The brief is quite clear that socialists, especially those who may have expressed support for the Corbyn project, will not be considered. And the first job of the new “social listening” guru will probably be to root out these people from the party itself.
 
You glance at the social media consultants in the States, but they are all connected with Trump. Russia, the home of some of the hackers you most admire, is something of an issue for geo-political reasons.
 
And then, you have an epiphany. Israel!
 
Israel was a pioneer of electronic surveillance, manipulation and blackmail. It even had its own notorious specialist group dedicated to these cyber-warfare activities. Surely someone from Unit 8200 might be available, especially now that, under Starmer, Labour is turning its back on the cause of Palestinian rights.
 
“Hang about. This guy looks promising. He was an analyst and an officer in Unit 8200. Nearly five years in Israeli military intelligence spying on Palestinians is just the kind of experience we are looking for.”
 
“What’s his name?”
 
“Assaf Kaplan.”
 
“Is he socialist?”
 
“Oh no. He was running the Israeli Labour Party campaign when they got wiped out. Just six seats these days.”
 
“He sounds perfect. Let’s get him in.”
 
And get him in they did. He’s been in charge of social media surveillance since December last year. And he’s doing a good job, trawling through members’ tweets and Facebook posts to keep the party free from any socialist tendencies whilst removing any reference to his military experience from his LinkedIn profile.
 
Appropriately neither Kaplan nor Starmer will comment.
 
Today from the everysmith vaults: Rose Simpson is publishing a memoir. Based on interviews and extracts, Muse, Odalisque, Handmaiden: A Girl's Life in the Incredible String Band is fascinating stuff and in preparation for its official publication, I am working my way through the ISB oeuvre and loving it.
5 Comments
Allan
25/1/2021 10:17:21

The coup continues. Doubtless the information he garners will be handed to our unelected General Secretary who now has the power unilaterally to veto any proposed candidate.

Reply
Phil
25/1/2021 14:00:41

Is this true? I honestly find it unbelievable. Almost with malice aforethought.

Reply
Andy
25/1/2021 14:04:19

Perhaps we should all be using noms de guerre in case our new social monitor stumbles onto this site. I would hate to be thrown out of the party!

Reply
David
25/1/2021 14:07:05

Starmer and his IMI recruit have not commented as you point out. Nor have they shared, liked or retweeted.

Reply
Ally
11/4/2021 16:16:01

Well, one can hardly be surprised, can one? You allow those that scuppered the 2017 election, to have their man in charge, it seems an obvious move to me...

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    Max Smith

    European writer, radical, restaurateur and Red Sox fan. 70-something husband, father, step-father, grandfather and son. Resident in Warwick, England.

    Picture
    Picture
    Picture

    RSS Feed

    Categories

    All
    Art
    Baseball
    Books
    Film
    Food + Drink
    French Letters
    Leamington Letters
    Media
    Music
    People
    Personal
    Politics
    Sport